May 13, 2005

When I am feeling blue


Blue Nude by Pablo Picasso, originally uploaded by jo(e).

My home office is a little room right near the front door of my house, just off the main living area, which is usually filled with noisy children and teenagers. Usually, the door of my office is open, and while I am sitting at my desk, I can talk to anyone who comes in through the front door or who walks down the stairs. I can look across into the living area to see the kids sitting on the floor playing cards or Boy in Black at the drums. I can look through the window of my office and watch as cars arrive on Friday afternoon, dropping off our extra kids.

No one in my family is allowed into my office without my permission. It's my own space, the only time in my life I have had a whole room to myself. When I was growing up, I don't think I ever even had a bed to myself.

On the wall behind the door, I have a poster of one of my favorite paintings: Pablo Picasso's Blue Nude. You can only see this poster when I shut the door, so most people do not know it is there. When I am in a blue mood, I will sometimes go into my office, shut the door, and sit on the floor with my back against the bookcase. I like the feel of all my books -- all those writers who have made me who I am -- surrounding me. I play a CD on my computer: Joni Mitchell's Blue, perhaps. I look at the poster of this painting, and marvel that someone somewhere was able to capture the way I feel.

5 comments:

bitchphd said...

Wow.

I want that painting, and I definitely need an office and a "do not enter without permission" rule. You're my role model.

Rana said...

Interesting coincidence: earlier tonight D. and I were both comiserating about having each separately spent the day in a depressive funk, and about the importance of us both having some sort of private space for brooding when we move in together -- and then I come here and see this. Wonderful post, jo(e).

Yankee, Transferred said...

Lovely post and I am envious. Man, you are just too cool.

Ianqui said...

I love picasso's blue period. I used to have Le Gourmet in my bedroom growing up.

Hmmm. I kind of want to get that from my parents now....

Evie P. said...

me too, i love that painting, i have a postcard of it somewhere i think, or else i cut it from a magazine.