Another hot, humid week. I get tired of lying on the floor complaining about heat and try to take some action to do something with my kids. But alas! My fourteen-year-old, that is, the infamous Shaggy Hair Boy, has little interest in bonding with his mother.
Me: Hey, let's go to the beach at Pretty Colour Lake and take a swim.
Shaggy Hair: No, that would be boring.
Me: Boring? You used to beg me to go swimming! You love Pretty Colour Lake.
Shaggy Hair: It's too hot. I don't feel like going.
Me: You want to just stay home and talk on the telephone?
Shaggy Hair: Yes.
Me: Hey, it's another hot humid day. Let's not just lie on the floor and whine. Let's go to the beach at Pretty Colour Lake and go swimming. Wouldn't that be fun?
Shaggy Hair: No, that would be boring. Just. Plain. Boring.
Me: You don't feel like swimming in this heat?
Shaggy Hair: No. Not at all.
Shaggy Hair: Hey, Mom, have you seen my bathing suit? Pretty-Girl-With-Great-Singing-Voice-Who-Has-a-Big-Crush-on-Shaggy-Hair just called. Her Mom is taking us to the beach at Pretty Colour Lake.
Me: What? I thought that the beach was boring. Just. Plain. Boring.
Shaggy Hair: Where is the sunscreen?
Me: I've been trying to get you to go to the beach ALL WEEK.
Shaggy Hair: Can you put sunscreen on my back? PrettySingingCrushGirl will be here any moment.
Me: I wanted to go to the beach. I've been wanting to go all week.
Shaggy Hair: Well, now you can't.
Me: I can't? Even in a separate car?
Shaggy Hair: No. That would be following me around. That. Is. Not. Allowed.
Me: What? How unfair is that?
Boy in Black: He's right, Mom.
FilmGuy: He's got a point.
Daughter: Just accept it.
Me: Hey, With-a-Why, want to go spray the hose on ourselves or something?
Me: Why not?
With-a-Why: That would be boring.