April 03, 2008

Top Secret

Shadow women

We met on the steps of Dead Famous Guitarist Chapel, two bloggers getting together for lunch on an April afternoon. Fire Ant is the name she uses on her blog, although I've been known to call her Often Erotic Sometime Blogging Friend, a pseudonym that was changed just a couple months ago to That Naked Blogger.

We were friends for years before blogs had even been invented, so our conversation over lunch delved into all kinds of topics, including some hypothetical discussion about just what can be done with the different pieces of a bicycle. Eventually, we did talk about blogging; I was feeling regretful that I was not at the FourSeas Conference, going on right now in City Stupidly Built Below Sea Level, a gathering that includes a whole bunch of my blogging friends. All the naked photo shots I could be getting! My readers do love the naked photos, and I live to serve my readers.

"You need another man to strip for you," Fire Ant said.

She's right. I haven't had a naked man on my blog since the time Artist Friend's brother posed for me. We talked over male bloggers we knew, discussing the possibilities. And almost immediately, we hit on the solution.

Picky Mick
. He's the studly brother of Pilgrim/Heretic, which means that the photo would fit the Naked Brothers theme. Seriously, how many bloggers out there have a tradition of posting naked photos of their friends' brothers? I could be the first. Plus, he's cool. He has a sense of humor and a blog. He's a singer/songwriter, which means he's used to baring his soul in public. Singer/songwriters are like poets. They take their clothes off all the time.

So yeah, we think it'll be easy.

Of course, Male Blogger Who We Think Would Look Good Naked lives halfway across the country, in Middle of the Flyover Zone State. So we started brainstorming ways to fund a visit him.

"We need to both publish books this year," Fire Ant said. "Then we can go on a book tour in State in the Middle of Nowhere. We can start with a reading at his bar." That plan made sense. It seemed to us that the residents of a State So Bland I Can't Even Come Up With a Pseudonym could use a little entertainment.

"Or if that's too much work, maybe we can just plan to write a book. And write a grant for that," I said.

And so we have a plan. It's top secret, so please, no one leak this to Soon to be Naked Blogger. We want him to be surprised when we show up at his bar, get him drunk, and demand he remove his clothing.

We know that secretly, he'll be pleased.

18 comments:

Kathy Rogers said...

Hendrix Chapel. No. Allman Chapel. No. Segovia Chapel. No. There is a Segovia Cathedral. But it isn't named after him. Reinhardt Chapel. Again, there is one, but it isn't named after him. Harrison Chapel. No.

I give up.

As much as I loved Stevie Ray Vaughn, I know there's no chapel named after him. More's the pity.

And Clapton may be God. But he isn't dead yet.

Maybe you need to check your spelling....

And I love the way FireAnt gets right to the point.

jo(e) said...

kathyr: It's true that the chapel name is spelled wrong. It's possible that whoever named the chapel may not have been thinking about the Dead Famous Guitarist at all ....

But hey, FireAnt is the one who came up the pseudonym. So blame her.

jo(e) said...

Oh, and your first guess was the right one.

Anonymous said...

That's one of your best shadow pics yet.

Anonymous said...

Why aren't you both naked in the photo? With all that sun it must have been warm enough.

jo(e) said...

It's true that the lines of the shadows in this photo would be a lot cleaner if we weren't both wearing bulky clothing and carrying bags. We talked about stripping naked for the shot. What stopped us wasn't the cold weather, or even the fact that we were in the middle of campus, with students and colleagues milling about, but my sudden remembrance that my son Boy in Black attends Snowstorm University, and if he came across his mother posing naked on in such a public place, well ... I am not sure he would ever recover.

Bitty said...

Some days I am just so darn pleased with what blogging brings to my life. Without it, the voices I never would have heard, the evil plots I never would have been privy to, the laughs I never would have had.

Could you hear me laughing all the way down here in Florida?

Rev Dr Mom said...

So I'm sitting in Panera with my computer this morning and cracking up...thanks for making my morning!

Sharon said...

More laughing from FL :)
Plan your work, and work your plan.

Michael Campbell said...

We in the Square Cornered States recommend you plan your trip in the summer. In the winter the men here don't cast a very impressive shadow.

Skip writing a book. Find a publisher for mine, and I'll fly you here.

Gotta go. Apparently I have to go do about two thousand sit-ups.

jo(e) said...

Picky Mick: Oh, summertime for sure. Because you have to take us sailing too. That's part of the deal.

YourFireAnt said...

And take us dancing. That's part of the deal too.

FA

cieux autres said...

The state is quite beautiful.

cieux autres said...

I need to chime in further here. First of all, said state has quite a lot to offer. When I lived there I found it to be incredibly scenic. Certainly the beauty wasn't as aggressive as say, Sedona, but it was beautiful, nonetheless. The rolling golden chenille hills in autumn, stark beauty of the sandhills in the north, Warren Buffet...I could go on and on. So shut your supercilious eastern yap.

Secondly, I've put up with the naked blogging thing because live and let live. And I don't know any of these naked people--or the one I did know, I knew only slenderly, so it wasn't an issue. But I've fond memories of PickyMick and his place. I don't want that to be sullied by having those memories superimposed upon his nudity--as nice as I'm sure it is. Maybe you could just photograph his guitar naked.

Liz Miller said...

My Technical & Report Writing is at that conference in City Below Sea Level.

My mom will be there next week for the tenth anniversary of V day.

I love your shadow pictures.

jo(e) said...

Cieux autres: Ha! I wondered if anyone would defend State Where You Lived Briefly. I've only seen it on maps -- and it looks to be like a squarish pink blob.

I understand your sentiments about not seeing Mick naked, but I just don't think my female readers are going to agree with you.

Yankee T said...

Great shadow shot. Plan to swing by here on your book tour, wouldja? No way would I pose naked, and my brother lives in the Northeast, but I'd pour you a cup of tea.

Gawdess said...

Celebration is the word that came to my mind when I saw this shot - makes me think of celebratory dances around a fire and these are the shadows flickering on the cave wall.