Blogging in blue

My blog has a new design! If you are reading on bloglines or sage, click through to take a look and tell me what you think. We are still tampering with the details. Well, okay, when I say we, I really mean the wonderful and incomparable Dr. MMMMmmmmm who did the design, found a template for me, and worked his magic. I haven’t actually done anything except keep sending him emails saying, “Oh, yeah, that looks cool.” So big thanks to Dr. MMMmmmmmmmm.

Of course, some thanks goes to Scrivener, who initially responded to my begging and whining for help by agreeing to help and forwarding my pathetic pleas to Dr. MMMmmmm.

And check the post below this if you want to see With-a-Why’s Halloween costume.

Duct tape, aluminum foil, and a little imagination

One of our Halloween traditions involves making costumes at the last possible minute. My long time readers know that I can make a pirate costume in fifteen minutes. But this year, I decided to be pro-active and help With-a-Why make his costume ahead of time. We started on Thursday, days ahead of time.

I know there are crafty parents who can whip out a sewing machine and make some kind of spectacular costume. I've met people like that. I am not one of them. I am the parent who will help my child hastily assemble a costume out of stuff we've got lying around the house. I trust the crowd at the Halloween parade to have a little imagination. And if people aren't imaginative enough to appreciate a homemade costume, it is NOT MY FAULT.

With-a-Why said he wanted to be a robot. Not any robot, though. Boy in Black convinced him that he wanted to be Bender. Some of you readers might already know this, but Bender is the robot on the animated television show Futurama, a show that apparently does not count as a television show in my house because Boy in Black downloaded episodes and watched them on the computer. See, it's not a television show if you don't watch it on a television. A convenient loophole in the summertime no-television rule. And Boy in Black converted With-a-Why to a Futurama fan by claiming that they were doing some brotherly bonding at the computer. He's got the idea that I will just cave in whenever I hear the word bonding.

The idea of making a costume to imitate something on a TELEVISION SHOW pained me deeply. But I decided to sacrifice my own ideals because my son seemed excited about the idea. And besides, I was tired, and the costume seemed like a simple one. A robot, I figured, was a classic Halloween costume, one that I remembered from my own childhood. And of course, I figured that Boy in Black would help, and it would be a good bonding experience.

Every good Halloween costume begins with duct tape, and we had a whole roll of grey duct tape from the dollar store. A helpful blogger suggested aluminum foil, and soon we were on a roll.

Making a costume with little kids is really fun because you can impress them with simple skills. Making a costume in a roomful of teenagers is somewhat different. Here is how our conversation went:

Me: Okay, let's just cut this poster board in two and wrap it in aluminum foil. I'll put strings on so they hang in front and back.
Boy in Black: But that's a rectangle!
Me: Yeah ... so what?
Boy in Black: You can't have rectangles. Bender is made of cylinders.
Me: (Glaring) Use your imagination.
With-a-Why: (in a robotic voice) I am Bender. Please insert Girder.
Me: Oh, that's good. You sound like a robot.
Shaggy Hair: Oh, you might not want him talking like Bender.
Me: What? Let's everyone be supportive here.

Boy in Black: What are you doing now?
Me: If I wrap the arms of his shirt in duct tape, they will look just like cylinders. Exactly. Like. Cylinders.
Boy in Black: I am not sure about the aluminum foil.
Me: What? It looks great.
Boy in Black: Bender is not made of aluminum.
With-a-Why: He is 30 percent iron, 40 percent dolamite.
Boy in Black: 40 percent ungsten.
With-a-Why: Don't forget the .04 percent nickel impurity.
Me: That is more than 100 percent.
Boy in Black: (patiently) Yes, that is why it's funny.
Shaggy Hair: She just doesn't get the funny parts of the show.

Boy in Black: The aluminum foil makes him look like the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz.
Shaggy Hair: Or leftovers maybe.
Me: (Silent glare.)
Boy in Black: (hastily) Oh, the aluminum foil is a great idea. Just. Perfect.

With-a-Why: What are you doing?
With-a-Why: (to his brothers, in shock and horror) She is putting her leg in my shirt!
Me: I just need to hold the fabric out so that the duct tape won't be on too tight.
With-a-Why: You expect me to wear that now?
With-a-Why: After your leg has been in there?
Me: Don't be ridiculous.
Shaggy Hair: How are you going to get that off?
Me: What?
Me: Ahhhh! Someone help pull this off my leg!

phone rings
Me: Hello.
Daughter: Hey.
Me: I've got a shirt stuck on my leg with duct tape.
Daughter: (laughing) What?
Me: I am helping With-a-Why with his Halloween costume.
Daughter: What? Are they having the party and parade tomorrow? On Friday? That doesn't make sense.
Me: We are making the costume ahead of time.
Daughter: AHEAD OF TIME? You've never done that before.
Me: Ahhhh. I am going to just rip this off.
Daughter: What is he going to be?
Me: That robot from Futurama.
Daughter: Oh, that is so cute.
Daughter: (to roommate) My little brother is going to be Bender.
Daughter: I ought to bring him to a frat party. They would love him here. I could just see him playing beer pong.
Me: He is even talking in a robot voice.
Daughter: Yeah, you might not want him talking like Bender.
Me: What? AHHH. I CAN'T GET THIS SHIRT OFF MY LEG.
Daughter: Can you check my closet for that black dress I wore to the piano recital? I've got a Halloween party tonight and I am going to be Cruella DeVille.
Me: I can't walk right now.
I hand off the phone to someone else.

Me: Okay, let's stuff the arms and legs with newspaper while we put on the duct tape. The leg thing didn't work so well.
With-a-Why: I can't get this over my head.
Boy in Black: Too. Much. Duct. Tape.
Blonde Niece: Duct tape has a non-metallic luster. I am not sure how I feel about that.
Me: (ignoring everyone) I think he looks just like a robot.
Blonde Niece: Shouldn't it look like metal?
Me: It's in the future. Use your imagination!

Me: (to With-a-Why) Try walking and talking like a robot.
With-a-Why: (in a robot voice) Up yours, chump!
Me: What?
Shaggy Hair: Uh, that is how Bender talks.
With-a-Why: (in a robot voice) Kiss my shiny metal ass.
Me: What?
Boy in Black: Maybe you ought to be a silent robot. I'm not sure the nuns at school are ready for Bender.
With-a-Why: (in a robot voice) I am taking the next pimp-mobile out of here.

Like wine

When Oscar Madison started an old clothes meme, Phantom Scribbler answered the challenge with a beautifully poetic post. Then Scrivener chimed in by bragging that he still wears a shirt from 1989. Unlike Phantom, I've got nothing poetic to say on the topic, but I can brag that I have lots of clothes that are older than Scrivener's t-shirt. For that matter, I have clothes older than Scrivener.

I've got a sweatshirt from 1988, a hand-me-up from Urban Sophisticate Sister. She graduated from high school that year and the sweatshirt bears the words I've Had the Time of my Life, which was the theme song for her class. The sweatshirt has a bloodstain on the sleeve from a traumatic car accident I was in 1991.

I've got two pairs of shoes from 1987. I remember the year because my first child had just turned a year old, and I was startled to discover that even though I was back to my normal pre-pregnancy weight, my feet had gotten a half size bigger. (Has that happened to anyone else?) So I went shopping with a friend and bought two pairs of black dressy shoes - one pair to wear with pants and the other to wear with a dress. These are still the only dress-up type shoes in my closet. I have not bought a pair since.

I've got bright yellow raingear from 1985, a full set that I bought at the Farm and Tractor Store. The store has since gone out of business, but I still wear the raingear up at camp. I do have a nicer raincoat that I wear at conferences and on occasions when I don't particularly want to look like a farmer.

I've got silk lingerie from 1984, the year I got married. Expensive silk wears well and never goes out of style. Besides, it never stays on long, and doesn't need to be washed that often. Spouse does the laundry in our household, and he is willing to take the time to wash silk by hand.

I've got a red sweatshirt from 1982, bought during college. It's got the name of the college written on the front. The sleeves are a bit ragged, and it's got holes from where campfire sparks have landed, but it is still the sweatshirt I wear at camp. I've got t-shirts from that era too, soft and worn. I'm planning to buy a new sweatshirt when I go visit my favorite north country blogger.

I've got a Lopi wool sweater that I knit in 1981 when I was living in London as a college student. It's a beautiful sweater but I don't wear it that often because it is really too warm.

I've got a white head scarf given to me in 1981 by a Muslim woman from Saudi who lived in my building in London. I don't have much occasion to wear it, but sometimes I will pull it out and put it on to demonstrate to someone how to properly put on a head scarf.

I have a red chamois shirt from 1979, my first year in college, given to me by a male friend that I was sort of dating. Well, maybe he didn't actually give me the shirt; I think I borrowed it and never returned it. I used to steal shirts from male friends all the time, especially flannel shirts and especially if I had a crush on the man. Nothing is as versatile as a flannel shirt. You can wear it as a beach cover-up, wad it together to use as a pillow, or even carry firewood in it. And I love the way a shirt smells if a man has been wearing it.

I've got a puffy down coat from 1977, the very first item of clothing I bought with my own money, just after I started working. I was a sophomore in high school, and I think down coats had just been invented. I do have a newer ski parka that I wear to campus and to the ski slopes, but when I am working on trails in my own woods, getting covered with mud, this is the coat I wear.

I've got a long red stocking cap, blue yarn mittens, wool socks, and several scarves from the 1960s, stuff I wore as a child that I still keep in a bin in our laundry room, for wearing in the woods or lending to extra kids who come here. The red scarf I will probably hang on to forever because I remember clearly the year that I got it for Christmas. The third of three girls born in a row, I was very used to wearing hand-me-downs and that scarf was the first item of clothing that I can remember being brand new and all mine. I guarded it jealously, throwing a fit if one of my siblings grabbed it and tried to wear it. And the red stocking cap I bought with my grandmother on an exciting trip downtown to see all the stores decorated for Christmas. I now wear these bright red items in the woods during hunting season so that I won't get mistaken for a deer.

Looking at my closet, I would say - to be honest - that most of my clothes are pretty old. I hate shopping, and I buy clothes only when necessary. I live in a climate that does not make nudity a viable option, but if I lived on a South Sea Island, I think I would forgo the whole clothing option altogether.

How we spent our extra hour

It was a cold fall day here, an nice afternoon to spend in front of the fire. My Smart Beautiful Wonderful Daughter took a nap on one end of the couch, while Blonde Niece slept on the other. Spouse stretched out on the floor in front of the fire with a quilt and pillow. Our household boy band was recording music at the other end of the room, with SkaterBoy on the drums and Boy in Black on the electric guitar. As I sat in the comfy chair, with my journal in my lap, I heard the same songs over and over again (Daytripper by the Beatles and Bad Day by R.E.M.). The younger boys were quiet. I'd given With-a-Why permission to play a computer game with his cousin, Suburban Nephew, while Shaggy Hair played against FirstExtra.

When the musicians took a break, moving into the kitchen area to root through the refrigerator, I could feel dusk settle into the house. The fire crackled, the dry logs snapping. I could hear a train whistling as it went by on its way to Chicago. Three deer wandered into the yard, grazing the back meadow, just outside the window behind the couch. I watched the deer for awhile, and then stared into the fire before curling up into the chair and taking a nap myself.

Seadragon's Science and Books Meme

I am doing seadragon's cool science meme just to prove that we humanities people can do science. And because I want my blog to be interdisciplinary.

Favorite Plant: Cattails. Beautiful and edible. I love the way they ripple in a strong wind.
Second Favorite Plant: Oak trees. The most patient plants I know.
Favorite Moss Genus: Dicranum. It's all about the strong female.
Favorite Amphibian: Frogs. The ones I hear at night.
Favorite Reptile: Painted turtles. Who sun themselves at the edge of the marsh.
Favorite Bird: Great Blue Herons. Who build big untidy nests high in the branches of dead trees.
Favorite Mammal: Humans. Yes, I know that they are destroying the earth. Yes, I know they are a reckless, arrogant, irresponsible species. But still .... I've got this soft spot for them.
Favorite Biological Concept: The Intermediate Disturbance Hypothesis. The diversity of species is highest when disturbance occurs at an interval between the extremes.
Favorite Ecological Concept: There is no such thing as a free lunch.
Favorite Economic Concept Based on Science: The more places you drill for oil, the more expensive the oil will be.
Favorite Scientific Law: The amount of time a professor spends blogging is directly proportional to the number of papers she has yet to grade.
Favorite Chemical Bond: A covelant bond - when atoms share electrons. Because I am all about sharing.
Least Favorite Chemical Bond: A coordinate covelant bond - when one atom provides both electrons for the pair. That just doesn't sound like a healthy relationship, now, does it?
Favorite Number Associated with Science: I am torn between pi and the mole. Such a difficult choice. Or maybe I should go with the speed of light ....
Favorite Acronym from Forestry: DBH or Diameter at Breast Height. No, I am not making that up. It's how trees are measured.
Favorite Science Writers: Natalie Angier, because I love her feminist take. Robin Wall Kimmerer because I love the way she pairs traditional ecological knowledge with scientific knowledge. E.O.Wilson because he makes me see things I never would have noticed. David Quammen because everyone needs to read Song of the Dodo. Sandra Steingraber because she shows what we are doing to our bodies when we dump toxins into the environment.
Authors who can Change my Mood: Adrienne Rich. Linda Hogan. Audre Lorde. bell hooks. Barbara Neely. Sue Monk Kidd.
Book I Read Secretly and Rarely Admit to: Jill Conner Brown's The Sweet Potato Queen's Book of Love.

Friday Waterfall Blogging

I can spend hours listening to a waterfall, learning the rhythm of conversation between water and rock.

I took this photo last June in the Japanese Garden in Portland, Oregon. Even though I was in Portland for less than 48 hours, I went to the gardens twice, once with an old friend and once with a new friend. I enjoyed walking the quiet paths, admiring the trees and mosses.

The crashing, tumbling sound of the waterfall made a nice backdrop for our conversations, for catching up with an old friend and for getting to know a new friend. I love the way a conversation tumbles about, with ideas swirling and twisting and sloshing, always moving downstream.

Why I need a fall break

Adapted from *statgirl*.

10. We haven't carved our pumpkins yet.
9. My students have been coming to class looking like the zombies from The Night of the Living Dead.
8. I've been getting migraines again, and a week off might help.
7. I want to go hiking again while I can still walk through the woods without snowshoes.
6. On grey mornings, I want to snuggle under the down quilt and stay in bed.
5. I hate the sound of my alarm clock.
4. Faculty meetings are not my idea of fun.
3. I want to make squash soup and apple pie and homemade bread.
2. I am sick of grading papers.
1. I'd like a week of leisurely, daytime sex.

Coming home at the end of a tiring day

During late October, morale is low on campus, especially among first year students. Many are sick. During the beautiful fall weekends in early October, many first year students chose to go home and exchange viruses with their home communities, bringing back colds and stomach bugs. And they've gotten midterm tests back this week, with low grades for many of them. This is the point in the semester when some of the students realize that they are not going to make it in college, that academic dismissal is a sure thing.

I don't much like this time of year on campus. I know too much about what is going on in the lives of my students. I know that some of them have given up on the idea of college and are drinking every night instead. They are fighting with each other, roommates bickering and friendships dissolving. The couples that got together in the excitement of September are breaking up, amidst anger and tears.

Out of my sixty students, it is likely that one or two will disappear, choosing to withdraw and leave college now. Likely one will end up in the hospital for alcohol poisoning -- that is, if we are lucky and a responsible person calls 911. Many will end the semester on academic probation.

It's late October. Students are feeling tired and overwhelmed. Faculty are feeling tired and overworked. The warm weather is gone, and the trees are bare. It feels good on days like this to leave campus and return to my home community, where kids are decorating houses for Halloween. Carved pumpkins are appearing on porches, cutouts of black cats decorate the windows of the elementary school, and one lawn feature tombstones with funny sayings. Inside my own home, a fire makes the living area cosy while we begin brainstorming for With-a-Why's Halloween costume.

Stealth blogging

When I'm reading blogs at home, sitting at my desk with a cup of hot tea, a slab of dark chocolate, and a stack of ungraded essays at my elbow, I tend to read in a systematic way, using a site reader to look at blogs that have been updated, clicking through if I want to leave comments. I'm checking in with my regular readers, my friends. But on MWF, when I am on campus, sitting at my desk between classes, I don't use a site reader or even my own blogroll. I don't like to put my own blog up on the screen because it could be seen by students who come into the office.

Instead, I choose a blog and begin with that blogroll, just clicking and surfing to any blog that looks promising. I don't leave comments because I know I can get interrupted at any moment: I read a few posts and surf to the next blog. Although I do like the community building aspects of blogging, I have to say that surfing blogs this way, especially if I choose ones that I don't regularly read, has its own fascinating appeal. It's like working in a restaurant and overhearing interesting bits of conversation. When I'm travelling by train, I love the glimpses I get of towns and cities as we roll past, sometimes stopping long enough at a station for me to stare out at the people outside who are just going about their normal life. Surfing blogs feels the same way, bringing me bits and pieces of people's lives from all over the country.

You've got to have goals ....

Boy in Black, my seventeen-year-old son, has a very simple wardrobe. He owns three pairs of pants, a handful of t-shirts, one pair of black sneakers, and one hoodie. I know monks who own more clothes.

So he wears the same outfit to school every day: a pair of black zip-off pants and a black t-shirt, with a black hoodie added as his winter layer. Sometimes for variety, he wears a dark green t-shirt instead of a black one. For the last four weeks, though, he's had an accessory: a green wristband, the kind of paper wristband you get as proof of admission to a concert. The wristband is from the White Stripes/Shins concert he went to with his sister. Today I noticed that he was still wearing it.

Me: How is it that you are still wearing that wristband?
Boy in Black: I've been very careful with it.
Me: But that concert was ages ago!
Boy in Black: Yep, it's been four weeks.
Me: (suspiciously) Have you taken a shower?
Boy in Black: (rolling his eyes) Yes, of course, I have.
Me: How long are you gonna keep it on?
Boy in Black: My goal is to keep it on until graduation.

Well, at least the boy has goals ....